Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
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Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
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Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
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