Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
This is getting exciting. I almost wanna turn off all the lights, get some popcorn, and stare at my phone screen to see if she's going to say yes or not
And on a much sadder note, I'm way to drunk for this right now
Randomize
