Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
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