Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
people are starting to question the shark bite story
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
Randomize