I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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