Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
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