if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
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