how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
Randomize
