hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
