we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Randomize
