she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
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