Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
Randomize