just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
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