I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Randomize