weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
Farmville is her only friend.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
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