Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
23 Proposal Horror Stories You Won’t Believe
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.