I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
20 People Who Caught Their Significant Others Cheating and Hand Over Some Major Karma
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
33 Memes You’ll Find Uncomfortably Relatable If You’ve Ever Been Through A Messy Breakup
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?