I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize