Do you still have your period?
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
