idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
