Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
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