So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize