quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
