wake up i wanna do it froggy style
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Randomize