Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
Still dying that you shit outside
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
Randomize
