mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
and you fell through a lawn chair
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
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