So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
