I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
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