Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Awkward medical moment of the day: A very obese girl with a disorder that literally makes her hit herself punched herself in the face. Literally. While screaming 'MCDONALDS MONEY'. Right. Beside. Me.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
