I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Randomize
