is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
Randomize