They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
