guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
21 People Confess What It’s Really Like At An Orgy
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
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My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.