Buhtt sex?
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
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