My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
Confessions From 23 People Who Have Been Hiding Terrible Secrets
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug