He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"