I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
