I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Randomize
