Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize
