Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize