okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
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