if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
Randomize
