Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
Randomize
