we're blogging at a bar
Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
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