id be glad to
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
Randomize
