Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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