i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
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