I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
My bed smells like the plague
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?