just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
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