Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
Randomize
