I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
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